Friday, July 25, 2008

The Don't Judge A Book By It's Awkward Award: Backpacking Dad and Redneck Mommy

Disclaimer Part One: I was going to write a post about how I am in The OC, where I should be outside and at the beach every daylight hour but am instead hiding in my room, because I am a fucking chicken right now. I was going to write about how I spent the whole day reading blogs, and obsessively checking a few blogs in particular to read their comment sections, except for when I went to the pool, saw that there were other people there and went back to my room. I was going to write about how the only place I went to was Denny's, and the hotel front desk, but only after I argued with the woman about whether or not I could give them a signature over the phone. I was going to write about how I haven't even been to the beach, and not only because I didn't want to mess up my hair. But I didn't want that to be the post up when the imaginary hordes of people came here via BlogHer business cards or linky love fests, so I am - now, after babbling all that anyway - going to write about two more bloggers I met at BlogHer.

Disclaimer Part Two: This is going to be an interesting writing exercise, to see if I can convey all this so that you read what I think I am writing. Just know that a lot of BlogHer is first, quick impressions, and that words like thought, felt, impression, seemed, appeared will come up frequently, and there is a reason for that.

Are we all disclaimed enough? Ok.

One day, Tiff and I were looking for a seat from which to listen to the Community Keynote. The ballroom was one of the most intimidating places at BlogHer, in my opinion. 1000 women, all in one place, and most sitting at tables, which instantaneously creates 'groups' of which you are not a part.

As we wandered, trying not to look like we were attempting to find cool people to sit with that weren't so cool that they would question what we were doing at their table, I kept reading people's boobs, and in doing so, saw Backpacking Dad's nametag. I said to Tiff, "I have to say hello to someone," because we had a deal, remember? And I dragged her over.

I squealed at him (poor bloke), as I do, "Hi! I'm Missy from Australia! I freaking love your blog!" or words to that effect. He said Hi back, because he is cool like that, and I was very happy. That was all I wanted, for cool people to say hi to me, and then I didn't need to see them for the rest of the weekend. Problem was, I had sat down at his table, and Tiff had joined me.


I really should have thought that through.

See, I can sometimes chat to people quite well, but in this case, I hadn't prepared any small talk topics, as I already knew what his blog was about, and I'd covered the Australia thing right there in my intro.

Anyway, Redneck Mommy came over (or was maybe there the whole time and I just now realised who she was?) and I squealed at her as well, as soon as I recognised her.

Here's where the impression part comes in: they both seemed less than impressed that Tiff and I were at their table, and I was starting to think that maybe the squealing was wearing on people. I even suggested to Tiff that we could go get some more food, just so we could come back in and sit at a different table. But she wouldn't let me, so we were stuck.

And then Backpacking Dad asked for a photo with me, and I was thrilled that someone wanted a photo with me and got a smidge bit happier. But I still couldn't shake the feeling they weren't totally in love with me. And that was hard. It's not that they were rude, or unwelcoming, but that they didn't completely love me. Oh yes, I have it tough.

That feeling was completely shaken when the two of them left simply amazing comments - here and elsewhere - to the effect that they did in fact think highly enough of me that I should go back to totally loving them and their blogs. Which I have.

I'm feeling a bit something about this. I hope I have not offended the bloggers in question; I really do love your writing. I hope this doesn't sound like I'm manufacturing bad shit; I just want to put it out there that BlogHer does depend a lot on what people get from certain situations. I hope no-one thinks this is some lame attempt at creating drama; I wanted to write about my feelings and I feel using an actual situation (especially one that turned out fine in the end) is me being honest (and also letting you know that it was all in my head).

BlogHer, and blogs, is about little snippets of people, which we use to judge them. Poorly, in this case, for which I am very sorry, and you should all read these two awesome bloggers because I thought of them in a manner which is not conducive to the spirit of BlogHer, and I owe them one, or a bajillion.

Sooooooo. I freaking love you guys! Hugs?


  1. You sound very insecure and worried about what people think about you.

    You sound very neurotic.

    In other words, you sound just like ME!!!!

    Glad I'm not alone ; )

    I bet most people love you. You're full of spirit and adorable.

  2. Backpacking Dad does look slighty pissed. ;)

    It was great to meet you..all the way from Australia. Very cool. Hope you enjoy the entire visit.

  3. In my defense, I'm an asshole.

    You were awesome and that was the afternoon when I was tired and nauseated and just trying to stay calm.

    The entire time you were sitting there I was thinking "dude, you are such an asshole: say something, anything, interesting and cool." But I just couldn't. I still didn't have a handle on people knowing who I was and every gush (awesome though they were) just made me feel a bit fraudulent, and then as if I had to be "on" to deserve that attention. So, I'm sorry I'm an asshole.


  4. I didn't even get to meet Backpacking Dad, and he is so freaking handsome, I probably would have drooled all over him and touched him way more than is appropriate for strangers :)

    And even though I "know" a lot of other bloggers, I had times where I felt so sorry for myself, like "how come no one is looking for ME, no one is running up to ME asking to take a photo with me, am I just that obnoxious?" It's a hard social situation to navigate, and I think you did GREAT!

  5. I can vouch for backpacking dad's self assessment. And, he was probably just too awed by someone checking out his boobs.

  6. Quite an experience to feel the way you did :)

  7. I have to agree with Backpacking Dad. He is an asshole.


    Just kidding.

    First off, I'm horrified to hear that I put out that type of vibe, but it was getting to be a bit overwhelming for me at that point too. And when I saw you and Shawn, I was just so freaking glad to see familiar faces that I plopped my butt down.

    Only to run away later on when the emotion of the afternoon got to be crazy with the key note speeches.

    I thought and still think you are a lovely lass and I was so thrilled to have met you.

    I only hope that the next time we meet I can have a nicer cover to put on my book so you don't feel so off.

    You were fabulous and above gracious. And I thank YOU for that.

  8. Dude, how did this asshole thing come about? Lol, we all know it's not true.

    Honestly, the vibe was all in my head. I wish I could have demonstrated how these feelings can arise without mentioning you guys, but since we all know you're both freaking awesome, it was all good (I hope).

    I can't wait to meet you guys again when we are all in better moods and can have a proper chat!


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