Photo Journal: The Boys, Week Two

On Thursday, we went to the Beach House. Note that my dress is absolutely soaked, while skywalker is pretty much bone dry.




We went for a ride on a tram, cos that's what you have to do at Glenelg. (It was one of the ugly new, smooth, airconned ones, not this old, rustic, rattley, awesome one.) We had icecream, cos that's what you have to do every single day if you're with SW. AND THEN WE SAW HOUSE'S MOTORCYCLE! And then we saw House. He looks different in person doesn't he. Then we had dinner at Hog's Breath. Mmmm curly fries.




Friday we went iceskating. And DID NOT fall over. At all. Ever. For real. Awesome hey. And damn we're cute.




Saturday we made an awesome dinner in the awesome flat. (Yes I did actually give the keys back. I'm so insulted you'd think otherwise.)



And then we had to go to the airport. Where we sat around.



And were very silly and happy.



But now we are very very sad. Cos the boys have gone home. And I have to write essays now.



But we cheered up. Holidays! I love holidays! Shoes all around!



And GUESS WHAT?! (Even though you guys are never very good at this game, I'm asking anyway.)



Yep, that's right, Carla's coming to visit me! Whooo!

Guest Post #3: Whoever thought the Ranch would have this many guests?

I have this friend called Carla. She is a very important person who lives In The Real World, and also holds down An Actual Job with Real Money, and is therefore much too busy to regularly update a blog of her own (even though she has one. but she doesn't update, so...no link for you). This means she has to go out and Have Real Adventures In The Real World, then type them up for me to whore out for comments. So... go comment! Because she is funny. And she is the bestest friendest foreverest. And because I say so!

carlabalala says:
i commenwhored myself for you!
carlabalala says:
i'm the bestest friendest foreverest
MissE says:
you so are
MissE says:
wait, i need to add that to your intro

In this installment, she is going on a very small plane to a very remote town with a very hot pilot. Enjoy.

Part One: Meet James
6.06am Mum came into my room. Said "aren't you gonna get ready?" I replied "I still have 9 minutes left til my alarm goes off! Go away!"
6.15am Alarm goes off. Groan. Press snooze.
6.16am Mum comes in, turns on light. "Its twenty past six, hurry up and get up!" kicks me out of bed.
6.17am Have shower. Brush teeth
6.25am Get dressed.
6.36am. Have breakfast. Mum yells to hurry up.
6.40am Get in car. Forget water bottle. Get out of car with sister all pissed off cos we haven't left yet.
6.43am. On the road
6.47am Drop sister at the bus interchange.
6.48am Get to work car park so I can hitch a lift with a bloke from work (he's 60 so no "ooh! who's the bloke?!")
6.55am Bloke still not there.
6.56am Call boss to get number of bloke. Boss doesn't know. Said will find out
6.59am Boss calls back and gives blokes number
7.00am Call bloke. It seems he was parked on the footpath in front of work, not in the car park next to work.
7.01am. Kiss mum goodbye. She demands a hug. Give mum hug.
7.02am On the road
7.20am Get to air charter office. Sit in lounge.
7.21am Marvel at all the H-O-T pilots walking around. Devise plan in head to get their attention. Perhaps faint? Pretend to get phone call that dog has died and start crying? Walk into their change rooms by "accident" and say "whoops, meant to go to the ladies! Sorry!"?
7.25am While furiously thinking of a legit plan, Boss gets there. So does everyone else
7.35am Pilot (hawt! Hi James!) comes in and tells us that they're refuelling the plane, and it'll take 10 mins.
8.05am Pilot (James) comes back and says we're ready to board.
8.06am Get to the airstrip. Pilot (James) says we have to stop off at Katherine to refuel, adding an extra 40mins to the trip. Boss not at all happy. We weren't told this when we booked, and we were already late - we were supposed to take off at 7.30am, to arrive at 9am in remote community.
8.07am. Get on plane (how small! how cramped! Where's the in-flight entertainment?! oh right, iPod. House! Yay!)
8.30am Plane has not moved. Still in front of air charter office
8.31am. Looks like we won't be going to nearby remote community. No chance of booking another charter on such short notice.
8.35am Plane starts moving. Get to airstrip. 6 planes in front of us waiting to take off.
8.55am Takeoff! Much smoother than a big plane, surprisingly. Good sky - not clear, but small fluffy clouds evenly spaced.
9.00am. See big pool, and four courts. Try to figure out what it is. It’s the local pool! Follow the road, count the houses, and... THERE'S MY HOUSE! HI MUM!!!
9.05am. Lots of green trees and grass
9.10am Still lots of trees. Weeds too
9.15am More green trees/grass/weeds with occasional river/stream/road.
9.16am Sick of looking outside window. Time to watch house!
9.45am Wake up with earphone stuck to side of face. Charming. Hope I didn't drool... nope, face all clear. Hope I didn't sleep with my mouth all open - ewww! omg, hope cute Pilot (James) didn't see me like that! Wait - why is House in Atlantic City with some random guy who apparently will fall into a coma again (again?!) in a few hours?! And he's gonna help him WHAT?!
9.50am. I just saw Katherine River! And Katherine Gorge! Cool! OOOH! Waterfall!!! Wonder if could convince boss to get Pilot (James) to give us a scenic tour of Katherine Gorge. Decide not to risk job by asking.
10.00am Stop off at Katherine Airport (HA! THAT'S an airport?! Darwin's barely an airport, how can THAT be one?!) Get into airport (aka, a room) and wait for pilot (James) to refuel. No-one in airport, only us. Rubbish man comes to empty bins. Another plane stops and drops people off. Read signs. Apparently you can't sketch, draw, paint or photograph airbase, or you risk a fine or jail. Question whether you can sculpt the place - no fine there!
10.15am Pilot (hawt!!! James) comes in and says we're ready to go. See another sign that mentions No Aprons. Those crazy Katherine people!
10.20am Take off again. Watch scenery
10.25am Far to much green trees/grass/rivers, etc. Watch House
10.40am Look up. Start freaking out because can only see light grey surrounding all sides. Begin to think have died and am now travelling to heaven via a cramped small plane. Why couldn't I go to heaven first class Qantas?!
10.42am Realise its clouds. Clouds can't hurt us! Start to laugh. Begin panicking again when realise Pilot (James) can't see where he's going.
10.43am Force myself to take deep breaths and not let my boss see me panicking. Must appear cool under pressure so she'll give me a raise for being so brave - if we survive.
10.44am Realise plane is controlled electronically, and the Pilot (James) doesn't have to see where he's going.
10.45am Smack self in the head
10.45-&-a-half am
Boss turns around and asks what's wrong. Quickly say saw mozzie and tried to kill it. Hope she doesn't see red hand mark on forehead
10.46am Boss goes, oh, ok and turns back around. Breathe huge sigh of relief.
10.47am Decide to pack up and sit quietly til we reach remote community - which will be in a couple of mins.
10.57am Plane begin to descend. Wonder where the hell we're gonna land since its all dirt and scraggly trees, with pockets of swamp water scattered about.
10.58am Start to worry. Still don’t see an airstrip. Start to plan how will escape burning plane. Do I remember my first aid? Yes. WAIT! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WITH BURNS WHEN THERE'S NO FRESH CLEAN WATER?!
10.59am Land on airstrip. Obviously they built it while we were in the air, otherwise I would've seen it... right?
11.00am Agree with self that am a complete nitwit. Pilot opens door.
11.02am Am last to get off plane. Nearly fall out of plane because am dizzy. Pilot (James) asks if I'm alright. I say "yeah, sure, I'm fine" whilst gripping on to wing for support, and feverently praying I don't make a fool of myself in front of hawt Pilot (James). Incidentally, I nearly fell off the escalators at London Heathrow airport when we went to Portugal because the plane makes me disoriented. If mum wasn't behind me I would've fallen down (or up? we were going up, and if I fell down, the stairs would only take me up!), so I have a history of this. Not swooning because Pilot (James) is so hawt!!!

Part Two: Meet the Locals
11.03am Get into 4WD with very important person of the Community.
11.05am After nearly breaking jaw from the bumpy ride (bloody NT government won't seal the roads), reach primary school
11.07am Meet random people. School is in assembly.
11.20am School assembly ends. Kids go to classroom.
11.30am Kids come out of classroom. Start to line up for sausage sizzle. Feel hungry myself and wonder when we're gonna eat.
11.35am Random kids come up to me and ask what my name is. Who giggle when I tell them. They've all got nice normal names like Sabrina, George, Ben, Clare, etc. I begin to wonder how they all got a hold of shirts with 50 Cent on it, Billabong, Quicksilver. Can't remember the last time I saw so many brand-name shirts. My high school didn't even have that many - most of us were poor!
11.50am Finally get to have a sausage Sizzle. Get a burnt sausage.
12 noon Stand around listening to the adults talk. All very boring. Turn around and watch the hyperactive kids play on the equipment. Watch two kids try to nick off with the soft drink. Laugh when the teacher reaches for the bottle and finds it missing. Spot the kids in another area giggling like mad and trying to finish the quarter of fizzy drink left before the teacher finds them.
12.10pm Boss asks some kids if she can take their picture. They get all excited and start posing. She takes a couple and they ask to see it. She shows them and they all scream with laughter, making fun of each other.
12.15pm Walk across dirt track (sorry, "road") to see sports shed.
12.16pm Is not a shed, but a steel container with sports clothing and equipment in there. Council pay a bloke (18yr old) for the upkeep of the container. Honestly, its a good idea, full time job and provide training on loaning out equipment, keeping shed tidy and in order, and running after school programs.
12.20pm Get into 4WD to go to town hall. More jaw-breaking rattling.
12.22pm Get to community hall. See Mens centre -they're in the process of putting furniture in there. Putting air conditioning, TV, fridge, couches, table and chairs. Won't be open 24-7 but they'll open it for a couple of hours each day for the men to use. Women already have a centre, much the same
12.30pm Go into community centre office. AIR-CONDITIONING! HOORAY!!! Sit at table. Very important person of the Community announces on loudspeaker for the whole community to hear, anyone with concerns to come to the special town meeting.
12.45pm Dying of thirst, I reach for my water bottle for a long drink. Water in bottle only one degree cooler than outside. Decide to die of thirst, rather than drink boiling water. People come in.
12.48pm Recruit one local to become a member of the party. Get a couple of lads to register on the electorate roll.
12.50pm Everyone discusses problems in community. Try not to yawn as this is rude. Am yawning thru lack of oxygen because the small air-con is no longer coping with all 10 people in room, not because it’s boring.
13.50pm The community meeting wraps up. Promises are made to come back in a months time.
13.52pm Get into minivan for yet another jaw breaking ride to the health clinic.
13.53pm Get to the health clinic. Very important man of the Community goes to pick up Pilot (James) from the school while we meet and greet. Meet some lovely nurses, who are supremely pissed off about the airstrip, and Telstra's insistence on building a tower in a place which makes every pilot refuse to land on the airstrip after dark. Agree wholeheartedly with them, whilst feeling guilty that my hatred for Telstra, besides them being a greedy money-grubbing corporation, is due to them taking an extra 5 days to send me my modem for broadband... whereas the community can't get after-hours medical help flown in because of the tower!
14.25pm Leave the health clinic. Get back into minivan, with pilot (Hi James!) for another jaw breaking ride and head for the shop for some cold cold drinks.
14.26pm Get to the shop. Check with tongue to make sure still have all teeth. Swear feel a loose molar. Hope it doesn't fall out on the last trip to the airstrip.
14.30pm Leave shop. Guzzle 600ml water in one go. Hope don't throw it up when plane takes off. Last jaw breaking ride to the airstrip. Did I mention that my chest hurts because my boobs jiggled so much I felt like I was at the Carnavale in Brazil? Van almost gets lost in a pothole bigger than the Grand Canyon.

Part Three: Return of James
14.35pm Get to airstrip. Say goodbye to very important man of the community. Pilot (James - HAWT!!!) tells us to wait 5 mins while he gets the plane prepped for the journey back. We wait at the Qantas Gold Class lounge - a tin roof with two benches under it.
14.50pm We get into plane. Pilot (James) offers us water and snacks. I decline - don't want to throw up on (hawt) Pilot (James)!
15.03pm Take off! Surprisingly don't throw up. Feel woozy though. Watch scraggly trees/swamp water/dirt get smaller and smaller.
15.04pm Get sick of looking at scraggly trees/swamp water/dirt get smaller and smaller. Watch House
15.35pm Wake up. Why do I keep falling asleep unintentionally?!
15.36pm Try watching House again.
16.15pm Stop watching House. Look out of window, see more familiar green trees/rivers/etc. Play music and watch the scenery
16.20pm See Elizabeth River. Nearly home!
16.25pm See Darwin City, and Darwin Harbour. Cringe at what Toga is doing to the Wharf area. Pilot (James) is giving me a scenic tour! (I wish)
16.32pm Plane lands - could've been better Pilot (James)! Forgive him cos he's so hawt!
16.41pm. Pilot (James) opens door. I'm last off again. Nearly fall off plane (AGAIN!). Pilot (James) puts out his (strong!) arms to steady me. Have I mentioned I want to marry this hawt bloke?! And have his hawt children?!?!?! He asks if I'm okay. I'm all yeah, I'm all good! Walk off trying not to fall over.
16.45pm. Everyone says thanks to Pilot (James). He smiles (omg, HAWT!!!) and says no problems.
16.46pm Go home... and away from Pilot (James). :'o(

Hope you enjoyed the continuing adventures of Carla and Hot James The Pilot. (Well, we hope they will be continuing. Cos James is HOT!) Feel free to comment more on this one guest post than on the rest of my posts combined. I won't cry. Much.

Leaving On A Jet Plane

Things I should have taken with me from the flat before the boys left:

double bed
own bathroom
bath
own kitchen
fridge
dining table
couch
tv
dvd player
balcony
balcony chair
the view

Guest Post No. 2!: Just Joking

Me: I'm bored someone tell me a joke...... please......
Someone: i don't know any jokes

Why does no-one know any jokes?!?!?! Does no one on earth know any jokes, what is the world coming to?!?!?


If there is any one out there that knows any jokes please comment so that when i next ask that question i will get a proper answer!!!

TY Skywalker

Guest Post:- What greater honour ...?

To my enormous surprise I have been given the opportunity to appear as a guest on this internationally acclaimed publication.
It must be admitted this is due more to who I know than what I know, in that I have known the editor for virtually all her life. Skywalker and I are presently holidaying in the beautiful city of Adelaide, from where this blog emanates, and this has provided the opportunity author this post.
I suppose I should say something worthwhile - intelligent perhaps, even philosophically enlightening.
But despite having slept for two nights within the bounds of a Centre for Higher Learning - aka a uni, I don't seem to have acquired any additional knowledge, intelligence or wisdom.

All I have really learned is that the students are all very young, the girls beautiful, the food excellent, the hills steep, and the lecturers barely older than the students.

All the best to everyone at Flinders, thanks for putting up with me.

vsquared47.

Easter at Aldinga Beach Pt 2

The Great Easter Egg Hunt of 2007

aka Amy is so cute and has all the adults wrapped around her little finger.

Yay! People will push me on the swing forever if I just keep looking cute!

Easter at Aldinga Beach Pt 1

Aldinga via Christie's Beach

Hi! I'm back! You didn't notice what? Well, I WAS gone. And now I'm back!

So. We went to Aldinga for the weekend. V drode the Scarlet Lady and SW and I took the hire car. No, I didn't crash it. Are you proud? Now, we had very very strict instructions from V to NOT go to Victor Harbour. I don't know what he has against Victor Harbour, but apparantly we were under no circumstances allowed to go on any road that might lead there.

Quick, turn the other way!

Oops. So, this is where we are:

And this is where we need to be: Waaaay over there.

Me: Ok, where do we need to go?

SW: Ummm.

Me: Dude!

SW: Ok, ok, I'm looking, just wait a second.

Me: There's a thing up ahead.

SW: Ok, there's gonna be a thing up ahead.

Me: [Grrr.]

SW: You need to go either left or straight ahead.

Me: Which way do I go?
SW: You have to pick one, either left or straight ahead.

Me: I'm not picking one! Which one do we need?

SW: It doesn't matter, either one, just go left or straight ahead.

Me: PICK ONE.

SW: Go right.

Three's Company

A Day In The City

Gorgeous day. We went for a paddleboat ride, walked the mall, went up and down in the glass elevators, had lunch, and went to the SA Museum. Also hired a car, so yay! no more walking, busing, or freezing-cold scootering.

We Built This City

On Saturday morning, I stole borrowed a car and drove to the airport. I picked up the boys, and we drove to McDonalds for breakfast. We drove around the uni, then to the Hall, then to Marion, then to their caravan park. That night, I drove them to Brighton for dinner.

Now, we've all been to Adelaide a bajillion times. The boys have driven and been driven around it a lot. I've never driven in Adelaide (unless you count that one time down the highway between like Laura and Clare or somewhere) but I've been all over it, as have we all, in cars, buses, trains, trams.

This time, somehow, it was me driving them around my city. My little grid of Sturt Rd, South Rd, Cross Rd, Diagonal Rd, Marion Rd, it's mine.

Welcome to My City.

Facebook is Funny

Harry and Voldemort have set their relationship status to "Mortal Enemies."


Heeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Birthday Eri!

Happy Birthday Eri!

You are the bestest friend a girl could have for a year (although PS I did say you weren't allowed to leave right?).

Love,

Someone who will have no friends next semester.

(And PPS, no more crying when I try to give you nice presents ok?)

This is what happens when I have to wake up at Dark am.

When in doubt, add lots of photos

Step One: Out of bed. Step Two: Awake? Maybe later.



See? The sun isn't even awake yet.



Back behind the wheel of a car. Do you trust me?



Waiting patiently (ha!) at the airport. Admiring my own reflection in the glass walls.





Don't you wish we had these in Darwin? Or at uni?




You know you're mature when you can resist the urge to play on the moving things.





Oops! Not yet, I spose.





Closed? What do you mean closed? It can't be closed! My boys need to come through there!





Never mind. They're LATE!





Ooh! A plane. Hurrythefuckupmkaythanks. Look! It's coming!





Aaaand... there they are!!!




Wooohooo!

Winter Fashions Pt2

STICKY POST: The boys are back in town!

This is a sticky post. It will stick here at the top of the page 'til the boys get here, forcing you to scroll down to check if there's anything new here.

*****

In the comments, we will make a list of things to do when the boys are down. Starting... now! Go comment!

***

In addition, here is the (still-growing) list of things for them to bring down:



Scooter cover if you can fit it. Everything else is compulsory on pain of no icecream unless I say otherwise.
Never mind. I bought the Scarlet Lady lots of presents, so she doesn't need the cover.

My denim shorts How the hell did I leave them behind? No clue.
Grad dress Not sure if the top part is hanging up with the skirt or not?
Fuschia evening bag Again, how did I leave it behind?

"TKAM" aka "To Kill A Mockingbird"
"S&S" aka "Sense and Sensibility." Alternatively, it's the Spicks and Specks DVD - which I don't think exists, but if it does, that would be cool.
Dictionary fine, never mind
"Style Manual"
"HP6" Do not tell me you don't know what that is. And you want to make sure it's my copy and not yours that you won.

Skipping rope The black one. Or the green one.
Warriors face washer / hand towel & my #44 jersey and my shorts if you're not using them
Adelaide Lighting water bottle
Torch If I left it there... it's kinda grey?

Strappy wedges Under my bed.
Silver stilettos Likewise.

Lips Of An Angel Or whatever it's called. It's like the number-one song at the moment.
Khe Sahn - Cold Chisel
Rock This Party (Everybody Dance Now) - Bob Sinclar, Cutee B

You can put them on Your USB so I can put more eps onto my computer. Never mind that part. My computer works now. But I still want the songs cos the Flinders thing is stupid and won't let me illegally download songs.

Weather Report

FORECAST

Fri, Mar 30
Possible shower


min: 13°C max: 21°C

Sat, Mar 31
Mostly sunny


min: 13°C max: 23°C

Sun, Apr 1
Mostly sunny


min: 15°C max: 26°C

Mon, Apr 2
Showers


min: 14°C max: 21°C

So yeah, boys: that's what you have to look forward to, everyone else: thrilling stuff, hey?

Boys vs Girls

Me: And we had to watch this really weird movie with this bizarre sex scene, and at the end he gets knifed by a dwarf!


The Boys: Pornography, dwarves, slashing! What more could you want?


(And speaking of porn, have a pic from last night's Porn Party at the Tav. On the house. You're so welcome!)

Guess What?! (For real this time.)

Ok, so GUESS WHAT y'all!

I will even give you some clues.

Ok, here is the first clue.

And here is the second clue.

And even though you all were spectacularly unhelpful last time, here is the third clue.

SO GUESS WHAT?!

Fine! If winter's going to come, at least I'm going to look good

Ok, fine. Turns out me wearing summer clothes does NOT force the weather to stay summerish. It only gets me a cold. Thanks, weather.

But I just had to share today's outfit with you. (Everyone: No, you really didn't. You just think you did. Me: Too bad!) Basically, it's a who cares, UNLESS you've always lived in a place where you wear singlets and shorts all the damn time, which, let's be honest, is freaking awesome. However, on those rare occaisions where you go someplace with really shitty weather, you get to feel happy about it (until that too gets old and you want your proper weather back) because you get to wear high high boots with little skirts and singlets under cuute long sweatery* things. I know right?

And your hair does this awesome thing where all you've done is have a shower and while it's still dripping wet run some stuff through it and it transforms into these like curl things? And it's awesome.

*Yo, Carla is going to yell at me for being all American with the sweaters and whatnot but I'm asking, what is that? It's not a jumper or a jacket or a cardigan. It's a sweatery thing.

The Magic Laptop

Things that have spontaneously and mysteriously disappeared from my computer in the past two days:

• internet explorer
• windows media player
• the ability to put media player onto the taskbar thingie
• all but 17.1 megabytes of hard disk space

I have undisappeared three of these, but I need help with the last one.

I have about a bajillion photos and approximately 773 songs and two and a third seasons of Veronica Mars saved onto my computer. The songs are on my mp3 player: does this mean I can delete them from my computer? Should I store all the photos on a cd? Or should I possibly get a usb and put everything onto that? Or maybe I should just get more megawhatevers added or whatever it is that kids do to those new fangled inventions when they put too much junk on their hard drives.

What the Blog?! Update

As Jen so subtly pointed out ("WHERE THE HELL IS THAT POST WE DEMAND OF YOU?! WE GIVE YOU A BUTTON AND THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT US! STUPID WHORE." or something like that) I didn't post in the Second Asshat Award Competition Thingie. (And I'm going to pay her back for all that (imaginary) yelling but posting this on the little linky thing and pretending I did actually entered the 2AACT. HA!)

This is because of the subject. Asshats In The News. I'm sure there are a bajillion of them. But the thing is, I don't know about any of them. I don't watch the news, I don't listen to the radio anymore because I don't have to drive to work at a time when there is NO FRICKING MUSIC ON FOR THE LOVE OF GOD and am therefore forced to listen to the news, and I rarely read the newpaper (and if I do, it's mostly the basketball and the fashion and the comics. I know, you're shocked).

So yeah, while I am sure there are lots of asshats being reported, I am aware of exactly none of them.

(Although I do have one thing which is kinda amusing and slightly asshattish, if only in respect of what we consider to be 'newsworthy': Donatella Versace tripped going up the stairs.)

Moving on: The Third Annual Asshat Award Competition Thingie: Asshats at Work. HA! This one is just too easy, mostly because I already had it written and copy and paste is totally my bitch.

However, it was a really really big drama at the time, but I'm thinking it might not be that well written or it might not translate that well. So if you don't understand it, that's ok. You can just move on.

A bit of background: I worked at a childcare centre, where a kid called Hugo was meant to be picked up by taxi and taken to his preschool. As you'll see, it didn't really work out that way.

A Week In The Life

Monday
Dad was there to help us put Hugo into the taxi for the first time as he starts at Nemarluk preschool. Hugo demanded "That one car" in loud compelling tones but Dad refused to be compelled as he shut Hugo into the taxi with the idiot driver who wasn't quite sure where he was supposed to be going. Hugo, being smarter than the taxi driver, opened the door before they'd gotten out of the car park, so I put on the child lock and they proceeded (loudly, I imagine) to Nemarluk. Hugo was fine when I got him out in the afternoon only asking for "home" a couple of times before settling down to 'play with Jack and Sydney'.

Tuesday
Hugo wanted Dad but happily counted the nuts on the tyre of the taxi while I put his seat in. He got in happily and said "bubye" so I'm thinking it's all good. Then the taxi driver asked me what his name was, and I'm thinking it's even more good. This guy's not just going to ignore Hugo the whole way blah blah optimism. Then he goes, "Where's Sophia?" Um, what? Sophia, it turns out, is meant to be going to Wanguri. I run inside to check that indeed there is no Sophia and go back outside, where Hugo says "bubye" yet again, in the tone of, 'why I am not getting away from here already?' I remind the driver a number of times that this is Hugo and Hugo needs to go to Nemarluk before sending them on their way.

Wednesday
Third verse same as the second, a little bit louder and a little bit worse.
The driver asks D if Some Other Random Kid is ready to go as well, and again, we have to inform the nice man that SORK does not even go here, that they shouldn't be sharing a cab with Hugo, and this child, the one we're paying you to transport, needs to go to Nemarluk.
And cut the smokes thanks.

Thursday
Maria, who went here for a short time and also goes to Nemarluk, gets dropped off around lunchtime. We didn't know she was coming in today but y'know, parents are crap at the whole keeping us informed thing so what the hell. Forty-five minutes later, the taxi driver is back, saying it's time for him to take Maria home now. You want us to believe you had instructions to take her from Nemarluk to creche, just for a flying visit before delivering her home. Yeah right. Get your facts straight before you go delivering kids to random addresses.

Friday
Hugo doesn't go to Nemarluk on Fridays. On a side note: are they TRYING to make it hard for us? Anyway, you guessed it, idiot taxi man showed up.

Still to come...
What happened to Sophia? Did SORK make it to school that day? How frantic were Maria's parents when she didn't arrive home at the appointed time? And can Hugo make it to Nemarluk and back on the right four days next week? Stay tuned.

A Week In The Life Part 2

Monday
Idiot Taxi Driver: Hugo and Jeffrey need to go to Malak.
Me: Are you freaking kidding me??? This is Hugo. Take him to Nemarluk.
Him: Really?
Me: YES. Read the shirt. Hugo. Nemarluk. Got it?

Tuesday
Same thing, except this time he got a call to pick up Jeffrey from Malak and then take him and Hugo to Nemarluk.
I call mum. This is freaking ridiculous.

Wednesday
He wants to pick up Alexander (SORK) as well. NOT HERE DUDE.
And turns out the government's paying for it so now I don't really care how long they're making the trip. I still don't think they should be doing more than one kid at once. (Although dad says next term there'll be two kids from the centre going together.)

One Hugo is enough.

Thursday
Jack went home straight after preschool so I get a 2hour lunch and an early mark! Which... irrelevent, but still.

Oh and on Wednesday, D said the taxi driver was just about to drive off when she went out with Hugo. He hadn't even beeped! Idiot.

So, took Hugo out. No, SOORK isn't here! Did I say that a bit forcefully? Too bad, I'm sick of this shit. So are the drivers, apparantly, judging by the huge groan this one did as he reached for his radio to tell HQ they they'd stuffed up yet again.

Oh! And! Not so irrelevent after all. As I went out to go home for my two. hour. lunch! there was a taxi waiting there. Just on the off-chance of two fuck-ups in one day, I went over to say hi. Ooh, nice cold aircon. Stay on task. Yeah, he was there to pick up Hugo. Not here buddy. The early driver got the kid. The slow driver is not a happy camper.

Friday
No Nemarluk (or actually, "Nenamyuk").
Yes taxi. Stupid stupid stupid.
Do you want another kid with that? Jeffrey maybe? Or SOOORK? Nope, just Hugo. It's a miracle.

Now let's see if next week we can't put it all together now mkay? Cheers.

A Week In The Life Part 3: The Final Chance to GET IT RIGHT

Monday
Me: Hop in, here's your bag. Seatbelt on. Ok, bye.
ITD*: Is this Hugo?
Me: Yes [idiot].
Him: And Jeffrey?
Me: AAARRGGHHH!!!!
(then when I've calmed down)
Me: There is no Jeffrey. There is never a Jeffrey. Just Hugo.
Him: I have to get Jeffrey after. See? 17 something.
(and that's not me not remembering, his display actually didn't tell him the rest of the address)
Me: No. There is no Jeffrey. Take Hugo STRAIGHT TO NEMARLUK. Ok?
Him: Um, ok [crazy lady].
Me: Great.

Me: goes inside thinking, "Freaking idiots".
Him: gets rightthefuck on his radio, "What's the address for Jeffrey so I can go and get him RIGHT NOW and piss off this crazy person who was FREAKING OUT."

*For those just tuning in, ITD = Idiot Taxi Driver.

And incidentally, Maria gets the same driver every time, who even gets her out of the cab and brings her inside. What can't they sort Hugo's transport rightthefuck out? Hmm? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Tuesday

Ok, so I can't remember what happened in the morning. Actually, yes I do.

He's all, "What's his name? And where's he going? Oh, [the woman from HQ on the radio] was saying something about Malak."
And I just totally shut him down. "Nope, not Malak. Definitely Nemarluk. Okay? OKAY???"
Great.

But THEN...

I had planned to go shopping for a new bag so I could pack that night. I knew Hugo was likely to be a bit after three, so I'd told vsquared I'd meet him a bit after that. (I just got to the end and realised I never finished off the shopping story, so here it is: I went shopping, found a bag, and was back in time for late snack. How awesome am I?)

So it's five after three, which is the latest he's ever been (and that had only been once, all the other times had been between five to three and three o'clock). I was waiting out in the foyer til he came, accompanied at various stages by random people on their breaks/knocking off/passing through.

At ten past, we call Nemarluk. He's already been picked up.
We call the taxi company. He's already been picked up. He should be here soon.

We wait. And wait.

We call Nemarluk again. (Why they didn't tell us he was going to be late is beyond me.)

We wait some more.

Hugo arrives at 3:40pm.
Basically fifty minutes late.
And PS: not really buying that he was picked up by ten past.

Turns out that our driver (Frank) dropped off Jeffrey (who is now his normal passenger) then went back to Nemarluk to pick up Hugo and SORK who hadn't been picked up by their random drivers. So Frank, being the good citizen that he is, took both of them, dropped off SORK, then brought Hugo here, only to be abused by yours truly.

Actually I was very restrained, especially after he explained the sitch. He even offered to become Hugo's regular driver, which as far as I know is what's going to happen.

The real kicker: D called mum specifically to let her know what happened, as The Parents hadn't arrived when D's shift was over. (Work said they'd left ages ago.) So D hung around to let them know. Mum's response? "Wow Hugo, been all over town today?"

Oh my freaking god. You know, I said not to call The Parents during the crisis, because what could they do that we weren't already. Worry? I said that we weren't doing. But y'know, next time we'll be able to, as I know it won't even stress them out.

Wednesday

OH MY FREAKING GOD! THEY FINALLY GOT IT RIGHT! I AM SO PROUD.

(Only took you two and half weeks you freaking idiots.)

They make you learn at maths at uni

Ok, there is a REASON why I am doing English.

The maths and me? Not such good friends.

Which is why this whole daylight savings thing confused me in the first place. That and the fact that I have waay too many electronic devices that (could potentially) tell me the (wrong) time.

And now, it turns out that it FINISHES. And you just have to turn your clocks back? forward? again.

And so I am confused. With the changing and the maths and all.

The dining hall clock had the right idea: if you never change forward you never have to change back. Or vice versa?

Today

What to write about?

I am totally at a loss here.

It's a week after this entry and one week before next Saturday, and somehow, you all are going to have to write this post for me.

[/sarcasm]

So, what is this entry about. You tell me.

Word Count

Rainy Days

Who's the smart cookie who decided to go for a scooter ride on the rainiest day Adelaide's ever had?
Who got lots of sympathetic grins from guys on her way out of the Marion carpark?
Who got beeped at as she went sloooowly around the corner through a puddle a foot deep. (Am only exaggerating very very slightly.) Idiots. And turn your fricking lights on.

Let's kill a lot of trees

Lady at the MVR: Is it registered in joint names?

Me: Yes.

Lady at the MVR: You'll need to provide proof of SA address for both people.

Me: The other person doesn't live here.

Lady at the MVR: So you want it just in your name. If you want to change any details you'll need an inspection.

Me: I'd like to keep it in both [so I don't have to get an inspection].

Lady at the MVR: Ok, just bring in proof of SA address for both of you.

Me: Ok, guess I'll just go get an inspection then.

***

Other customer chick at the inspection place: ~plays with her phone. beep. beep-beep. beep. beep-beep.~

Me and a bunch of blokes also waiting in this tiny little room: ~exchange glanes because honestly.~

Me: Excuse me? Could you possibly turn the sound off?
Her: I'm not playing anything ~shows me her phone so I can see that indeed her phone is making all these annoying noises without her 'playing' anything at all.

Me: Um, ok [crazy lady] [shut your phone up mkay thanks].

***

Different Lady at the MVR: Ok, have you got the forms for that?

Me: Here's the registration one, and the license one, and the inspection one, and the current registration, and the proof of address, and my current license.

Her: Right. You just need to fill out this form for me.

Me: Sure [are you fucking kidding me?].

Later...

Her: Was it registered in joint names?

Me:Yes.

Her: Why did you get an inspection?

Me: [Grrrrr].

***

So, the Scarlet Lady was inspected and is now registered and her owner licensed. And out two hundred and forty bucks. Good work MVR. Now I just have to figure out how to put on the new rego plate (and get the old one off first).

The essential scootering kit.