Monday, August 18, 2008

Olympics Drinking Game

So I can survive these few weeks, I have decided to create a new drinking game, based on the 2008 Bejing Olympic Games. (The first time to drink is if you hear it referred to as a year other than 2008. Shot! (Seriously. 2006.))

The one guaranteed to get you totally smashed: Drink for any mention of Libby Trickett when she's not actually racing. Double if they interview her and totally ignore the people who actually won medals. (I am not going to give you a Michael Phelps one, you won't last five minutes. THE TABLE TENNIS. They managed to work a mention of him into the TABLE TENNIS for crying out loud.)

The 'Grrr, Channel Seven' one: Drink for any time Channel Seven decides to run a ten-minute "highlights" package when, I don't know, we could be watching actual coverage? Double if it includes that guy lying on the ground pouring water over his face. (Who the hell is he, anyway?) Drink any time they decide to cover a sport no-one cares about, where no Australians are actually involved. Drink if they can't sort out their contracts ahead of time and cut to the FOOTBALL, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, which we can watch any old damn weekend, or on Foxtel right this second, but noooo, never mind this one-time-only Olympic thingy. Have another drink, on me.

The 'I Love Commentators' one: Drink any time a commentator says something stupid. Just kidding! That'd be wayy too much fun! Drink any time a commentator says something unnecessary, like "And in Lane Number One, next to the other one, who is [TOTALLY COINCIDENTALLY] in Lane Number Two..." Drink any time a female commentator is scathing about another female's chances. Drink any time a commentator reminds us that this is totally important. For reals this time. These points are the absolutely crucial ones. Drink any time a commentator says something laughable, such as, "She's learned how to run. And she's only 24."

Man, this game is going to be so. much. FUN! Who's got more?


  1. Ha in the US drink when anyone says Michael Phelps, and itll get you drunk 3 times faster than Libby Trickett lol

  2. I like this game..... Can I join in?

    i will come down there and try it out...

  3. bobby g: Oh yes, same here. I didn't want you all unconcious.

    sw: Sure dude. Anyone. If you make it here, I'll even provide the alcohol.

  4. How about if we drink each time someone questions the age of the Chinese gymnasts????

  5. Oh good call. And every time one of my housemates bitches about the Chinese winning gold! (Can you tell we were watching the gymnastics last night?)

  6. You ae being totally unfair and unreasonable.
    these people are SPORTS commentators!!!

    I have a more serious broadcast problem.

    Scenario: An ABC political journo (these people are supposed to know all about words and even be able to spell).
    He was interviewing someone who was a (probably self-nominated) expert on terrorism and torture, etc.
    In talking about people being under surveillance they talked about them being "surveilled"!!!!!!!

    Perhaps there is such a word, but if there is I reject it to the same degree I rejected John Howard (ex-political non-entity who somehow got to be PM of Aust.)
    (sorry - not an ex-political non-entity, still is one, but now retired).

    What's wrong with people who are being watched being "surveyed"?????

    Sorry, a bit off topic I know, but I'm too old for self-destructive drinking games.

  7. I like surveilled!

    It's better than surveillanced at least.

  8. Awesome. How about every time the commentator notices some some gymnastics error nobody else does. Eh, that would also get us drunk.

  9. Ha yeah they're like "And you can see that error there," and we're like, "Um, no we can't!"

  10. So funny! If I took a drink every time they mentioned Michael Phelps, I would be under the damn table, passed out in my own vomit.

    Also? I am pretty sure they are changing the name from "swimming" to "Phelping", beyotches.

    Can you imagine the next girl he goes out with? She won't fit in the car next to him and his big head. And truly? If you are the most decorated Olympian ever? I am pretty sure you have a right to have a big head. But it will suck for whomever he dates next.



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