How I Almost Got Locked In Macy's And Then Met A Bunch Of Awesome People

I had had a make-over from the Bare Minerals people at the conference, and - like a total sucker - bought a couple of their products, to be picked up from the Macy's party.

Naturally, I was way too busy prancing around the lingerie department, or demanding bottles of wine since they'd run out of glasses, to even think of searching for my purchases. Until like the very last second, when it occurred to me that I'd given these people my credit card number, it wouldn't be too good if I didn't track them down.

Which I tried to do and was sent to the cosmetics department, bottom floor. Except that the very bottom floor was closed and the dude wouldn't let me down the escalator. But then I was all "I need to pick up my crap!" and must have looked a little emotional, so he was like, "I'm going to get someone from security" which was different to the "Security!" call that he could have made, so that was good.

Security took me downstairs and found me a make-up person. Turned out my crazy foreign credit card hadn't even gone through, so I could have just left without my "crap." But I got it, and they made me walk out the employees entrance as it was so late. I had to have my bag searched (black, clutch, TINY, like, my phone barely fit - plus she totally ignored the huge Macy's bag I was carrying that would have fit all kind of stolen merchandise) by the door bitch, and then I was released.

As I stepped out the door I realised I was on the totally opposite side to where I'd come in and had no freaking idea where the hotel was. I ran back inside and demanded someone tell me where my room was. Shockingly, the door bitch was unhelpful, but there was no way I was going back outside without some directions, a map, preferably GPS (with a battery that worked). I would rather have slept there (and since this means I would've missed the festivities of the last night, being locked in Macy's was much less appealing than it normally would have been). I was all, SERIOUSLY, NOT LEAVING. WHERE IS MY CHEESEBURGER PARTY? at the guys in the security booth, who were wayy more helpful than the door bitch (shocker) and I made it home.

By the time I got there, a bunch of people were gathered in the lobby after the Cheeseburger Party had been broken up. I went up to a group of people which included someone I knew (maybe Jennster?) and maybe three or four that I didn’t.

After me and whoever had stopped chatting, one of the other girls was all, “Are you Missy, from Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch?” (Ok, first of all, SQUEE! This was the first and only time this happened to me.) I was like, “Yeeeees?” in the tone of voice like, you might be a psycho and I don’t want to give too much away, but I was really trying to figure out who this person was without reading her nametag or looking like I was trying. Thank god, she relieved me of the effort: “I’m Kristabella.” And I was like, “Really? Kristabella?” like, no, she just made it up. After I stole a glance at her nametag, I demanded a hug – and I’m sure there was a squeal in there as well; I was fucking excited – and babbled some more crap.

Then I realised I was making a scene and turned to introduce myself to the rest of the circle. “Hi, I’m Slynnro.” Shut up, you are not. OMG it’s Slynnro! “Hi, I’m Ali.” OMG it’s Ali Martell! And so on.

Seriously, that whole circle was people I wanted to meet, but hadn’t seen all weekend (or if I had, I’d rudely ignored them). I wish we had more time to spend together, but maybe next year.

In summary: it was freaking awesome.