How to lower your power bill: Get sick with a fever high enough that you don't even have to use your heater.
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Why would a room in a rehab hospital not have a remote control for the tv?
When patients can climb up on the bed and stretch up to the power button on the tv itself, they are all better.
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Lesson One on How To Give Confusing Directions And Make Me Lose Faith In Google Maps: Tell me the wrong name of the building, the wrong number, and make the street one that Google changes to something else every time I search for it.
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Friend#1: Coming out tonight?
Me: I'll come out in November.
Friend#2: Let's go shopping!
Me: I'll go shopping in November.
My Crazy Side: We should go for a run.
Me:
Lesson? (Almost) Everything in the world will be happening in November.
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Lecturers: How's that assignment coming along?
Honour students: THEEESIIIIIIIISSSSSSS!
Lesson: Sucks to be an Honours lecturer in Semester Two.
Hope you're feeling better!!!!!
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