Friday, January 16, 2009

Meet My New Imaginary Husband*

*He is imaginary in the sense that he is not my husband, nor does he even know my name (although he does know I exist), and not in the sense that he is not a real person. I just thought I'd clarify that.

Anyway, on the really hot day that we had, my dad and brother and I went ice-skating. As did many many other people, including a group from a school holiday program.

As skywalker (my brother) and I were skating around the big rink, I naturally took a little survey and determined the hottest guy in the place. (Actually, he was the second-hottest, but the first-hottest was eliminated due to the fact that he was probably 15 and was skating a bit recklessly considering the abundance of kids under ten on the ice.) My new boyfriend and I totally had a moment when some little kid cut us both off simultaneously even though we weren't really skating anywhere close to each other - and certainly not when I was in a good position to check out his arse - and we both did that kind of 'Why don't YOU go, crazy kid' gesture at him. We connected.

Quick cut to me on the little rink, helping dad out, as we got to a part of the railing being held up by a little girl (aged seven, almost eight). She gave me the cutest grin and waved us past in the most adorable way.

Then back to the big rink, some time later. I'm skating by myself, having been ditched by my boys. Cute Girl is now on the big rink, despite having limited skating skills. (The cuteness is still through the roof.) She's all 'OMG YOU CAN SKATE' to me as I go past her, so I stop and she's all 'Can I hold you hand?' I say yes, and we proceed to skate together for a little bit. What with her being a freaking chatterbox, I discover that her name is Hayley, she's with the holiday program group, and that my new fiancee was looking after the group. Clearly, this was FATE!

Just as destiny had arranged, my new husband came up to see if Hayley was bothering me (not at all, we're adopting her. She will be the bridesmaid) and we had even more moments!

And then we all went home, never to see each other again. (Hmm, I think it loses something there at the end there.)

Although: If your name is Ben and you were at ice skating the other day with a kid called Hayley and her friend Claudia, call me! I need you to confirm the guest list.


  1. I had a lovely relationship today with a girl I ran into (almost literally) at a bookstore. We continued to see each other for a while, often being in the same aisle looking at books. It was with some sadness that I approached the checkout counter and realized she was nowhere in sight - until she suddenly appeared in line directly befind me! After I made my purchases I strolled casually away from the bookstore, waiting for her to check out and catch up with me. Alas, it was not to be. Perhaps next time.

  2. That's a lovely story. I hope you two are very happy in the future.

  3. Missy! Why didnt you try to get digits! If he's shy YOU KNOW that wont happen, so you gotta make it happen! PS if all else fails ill be your imaginary husband!

  4. Dude, awesome post, it made me laugh my arse off! I miss you! Will the wedding be at the ice rink? I feel this is appropriate in this instance... although you might have to get the wedding set up every time you go to the ice rink on the off chance you bump into him there... *sigh* it sounds like a fairytale!

  5. I don't see what the problem is!

    You're in the same city of only around 1 million people (so only abut 500,000 blokes).

    You know what sort of work he does, and that he knows a skating child called Hayley. also that he can skate.

    The poor feller hasn't got a hope!!!

  6. I think it'll be easy enough for you to find him. And I think setting up a wedding at the ice rink every time you go on the off chance he'll be there is an excellent idea.

    Do I get to be a bridesmaid, too? PLEASE?!?!


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